Darling – Let me buy it for you!

 Date: November 27^th, 2022

The morning birds chirping and the early sun rays coming thru the windows got me out of my sleep. 

Looking for Saraswathi, I slowly got out the bed and our regular tea with news papers were ready in our balcony.  Seeing around seemed to be our normal regular day. 

But the incident the night before kind of got me into guilty and clueless.

Freshening up quickly, went to the balcony and I was welcomed by warm smile as always by my life Saraswathi.  She seems to be quite normal. 

Smiling with my eyes I sat in the chair picking the newspaper.  Saraswathi, kept the book that she was reading aside, poured the tea into our cups. 

Striking for a conversation unusually, I asked her about the book she was reading, which had a title “Reinvent at Sixties”.

Casually, she replied that it is about stories on people at their 60s. I smiled! 

It’s been four years since my retirement from my banking job.  Me and Saraswathi, decided to spend peaceful life for some time before we became depended on our children. Both of our children were well settled and married. So we got our own house at Keshavapuri ready with required renovations, which was in old streets of Hyderabad.   Mostly all the houses in this locality were still with their old structures, well build and strong, like ours.  With lush green trees throughout the lanes, the streets were clam, and we had some good old friends and cousins nearby to cherish.

Upon my retirement, Saraswathi decided to quit her role as Principal and we both planned our new journey together.  Saraswathi was equally educated and talented as me.  But she opted for a career in education, which will give her enough time to spend with family and give me the freedom to focus on my career.  Like in those days ours was arranged marriage by our elders and I was 6 years older to her. Right from the beginning our relationship was more than a husband and wife.  We were first best friends for each other and hardly they was a need to lie.

Saraswathi call for our regular walking routine, brought me out of my thoughts.  Was she normal as usual or is she pretending to be normal! was unclear to me.

Finishing my breakfast, I told her that I will be going to visit my bank to finish some pending formalities and will be back by lunch.  She smiled and nodded.

Finishing my bank activity, I went to a library and found a corner place and started searching on my laptop on the last night incident that took me by surprise.

After browsing through some articles by some well known specialists in that area, I found it is quite a normal behavior, that I witnessed last night.

Still clue less on how to tackle the situation, I went back home for lunch, as Saraswathi is waiting for me.

After our lunch, Saraswathi sat near me and affectionately putting her hand around, she said, it is ok what has happened last night and she understands it and was not finding me at fault.  It eased me a lot in multiple ways and got me into a good after lunch sleep!

After that day we did not spoke about it and our days became normal again.

Ignoring issues was not my nature and could not stop thinking.  I could never share it and get suggestions from my friends or family as it would put both of us in embarrassment.  So, I decided to persistent with my research alone and silently.

After profound research and consulting some specialists, I concluded that I am not in position to handle the situation.

I felt sad and disappointed, not for me but for my Saraswathi.

I started to think practically after self-deliberation and started my research in different direction. 

I found an unprecedented approach to the situation.  Practically possible, ethically unacceptable. I got all the required information with required authenticity, and it is now time to prepare and put it before Saraswathi.

My thoughts became heavier, imagining, what will she think of me, is this the right thing to do, if so, how to put it before her? Can I convince her or will I fall before her forever.  Then I thought, we always get things outsourced which we cannot do ourself, like a massage, haircuts, medical situations, etc., and in all these situations do we feel embarrassed? no, then I might be right in my thoughts, still a might until, I put this before Saraswathi and see her reaction!!

I gathered all my courage and planned it. 

During our dinner, I was helping her serve into our plates and said, Saraswathi I have booked a candle lite dinner for us tomorrow. She said causally, who are joining us? I said, it is only two of us, her eyes opened up as she smiled and said, ho… romantic dinner…  I smiled and said want to gift you something unusual. She nodded with big eyes and smiled.

We both drove to the hotel the next evening and was warmly welcomed by the staff and were escorted to the beautiful corner place with open sky and fully street view.  The table had two large candles and no artificial lights around. Being a working day, it was quite with less people.

I asked her with a gentle smile, how do you like it? She said, quite romantic….

I helped her with the menu, and we placed our order.  I looked into her eyes and said, I want to say something, but request you to not make any conclusions! She nodded with subtle smile, like a teacher prepared to hear her naughty student story.

Do you still get that night emotion? I asked her shyly.  Hum… yes sometimes, she said without any expression in her face and focusing on her plate. 

I confiscated that I will not be able to handle that emotion.  Giving a pause for few minutes I said…. Darling, let me buy it for you.

Her face was puzzled!! and she was silent, as always, she gives the other person to complete their narration before she starts her point. 

I continued and explained her about the concept of blind date, and slowly about escorts.  I told her that it was nothing wrong with her emotion at this age and it is quite normal.  And the escorts were safe, authentic and identity leak proof. 

She was listening patiently without interrupting or expressions, like a judge listening to the participants.

I tried to explain her my viewpoint of the situation and how I think it like any other requirement that was fulfilled by outsourcing. 

I rested my case and waiting for her response.

She called the waiter and ordered a desert for both of us.

I was clam outside and nerves inside.

Vikram, thank you for understanding my emotion and for all your efforts to help me with that.  It is more than important for me that you understand it and also agree that it is not wrong at this stage of life.   

After a short pause, she continued, it is like any other emotion, like anger, hate and love, just that it needs a different handling.  Taking my hands into hers and gently rubbing with her thumb, she said with a gentle smile, and like all the other emotions time will handle it better, if not I will come back to my boyfriend Vikram for help. With a warm smile she continued, till then what all I need is a share your blanket.

Our smiles reached each other more affectionately.

We went back to our memory lanes, spoke about many different subjects, people, events, experiences and what not…. till the waiter softly interrupted us and said that we are an hour passed with the closing time and all the staff were waiting for us to checkout.  

We all laughed together.

I asked the manager, why did not interrupt us, he said, every staff standing here were looking at their future at our table.  We were glad to hear that.

I was high on everything. Me and Saraswathi met all the waiting staff and gave them a good gesture of our happiness and they invited us to keep comings without any pre-booking.

Our beautiful journey continues…………….